Utter madness reigns. Okay, so I'm going to Poland this weekend to train people next week. This requires me to get a visa. Since the nearest consulate is in Washington, DC, that is where I go.

Alarm goes off at 6:30 and it's up and at them (yay Radioactive Man). I head off to the airport and by 11 o'clock I'm running around Reagan National Airport in Washington. It's a nice ariport. Well, nicer than some I've been in.

So I go in search of an information desk that can tell me where I can get a passport photo taken, and then how to get to the consuate. I have the address, so that part should be easy. I find to lovely old ladies at the Traveller's Aid booth and they find me a place that does passport photos close to the consulate. I take the address, jump in a taxi, and away I go.

The place is just an average photo shop, in a nice, cosmopolitan part of Washington with lots of interesting looking restaurants and cafes. I think it's close to Georgetown University. Anyways, I get my photo and get directions to 16th Street and off I wander.

It was a beautiful day (Atlanta was look ing awful when I left), so walking was no problem at all. It was several blocks, so the exercise was probably good for me :-).

I get to the address that I pulled off the web, see the Polish flag and wander on up. Well, it turns out this is the address for the Consulate General, not the Consulate that gives out the visas. Damn. But the nice man behind the window gives me a map and directions to the consulate. It's not too far away, but it does involve another 25 minutes or so walking. It's good for me. At least, that's what I tell myself.

So, it's 12:30 and I get to the place where they issue visas. Well, I tried the front door and that was the wrong door. Ooops. So I run round the back and the very cute Polish girl at the desk gives me the forms to fill out and I give her all my paperwork.

"Excuse me, but you need a letter from the company you are going to visit." Oh crap. So I try to call my manager in the UK who is arranging the whole thing and there is no cellphone signal strength. Aaarrrgghhh!!!! The Polish girl goes off to see what can be done with my available paperwork while I wander around the grounds of the Polish Consulate trying to get a call out to the UK. I am eventually successful and Dave says he'll try and get hold of someone to fax over a letter.

I go back in and the girl comes back saying that the Consulate guy remembers my call from yesterday so all is well.

But, a few minutes later he comes back out to say that the photos I submitted for my visa look nothing like the photo in the passport. Well, I must admit that I have changed quite a bit since the passport photo was taking in 1994. I have put on quite a bit of weight, and I was wearing contact lenses rather than glasses. I makes for a very different look. He asks if I have trouble crossing borders. Well, I didn't have any problems when I went to Mexico earlier this year, but, well, Mexico ain't former Eastern Blok. It could be interesting trying to get into Poland...

All is well though, as he does issue me the visa. Woohoo. I call Dave back and say all is well and then it's off to find a cab back to the airport. I'd love to hang out and od some touristy stuff, but I have far too much to do before going to Poland on Saturday.

I get home arounf 5pm and try and organise myself. My big suitcase is broken; I'm short of business shirts - and underwear. I need some film for my camera. Aarrgghh!!! I'm going to Poland in less than 24 hours. I will cope.

And I do. I get as much organised as I possibly can and then it's off to the Local for some drinks with Stacy, Heather and John. I need it. I'm just so hyped out that I need some depressants in my system to bring me back to earth. Vodka and beer definitely do the trick nicely. Belvedere vodka, of course (it's Polish). I drank way too much, but it was fun. I flirted a whole lot with Heather (bad Damon), and did the usual Damon and John behaviour around Stacy (which Heather was kind of concerned about, I learned later). Linda showed up at some stage, as did Wiki and Susan and Charlie and Steve was also there. Vanessa turned up late with the girl I met with Charlie up at the Righteous Room. She's pretty cute, so it's nice to know there's a link there. Heheh, I'm bad.

I think I got home around 2:30am. Much later than I had planned.

2 September

Today I went to Poland.

Stacy rang about 9ish to say that Heather had recently left and when were we going shopping. I said I'd call her back about 10 and then we'd go. Actually I called her about 9:40 to say I was jumping in the shower and then I'd be over.

We went to Target up off Briarcliff Rd. I bought boxers, and a pair of shorts, and a suitcase, and a Power Puff Girls mousepad, and socks, and some other stuff that I can't remember. Oh yeah, and Altoids because Stacy and I both reeked of alcohol.

Then we went to Loemanns to buy me a shirt and I ended up buying Stacy some clothes as well. I'm not quite sure how that works, but she said she would pay me back.

From there we went searching for food and margaritas. We ended up at the Higlander where I had two and chicken quesadillas while Stacy had three (I think) and stuffed mushrooms. The food was good and the Power Puff Girls were on the TV. Rock on.

Then I went home, finished my packing (I hope) and Stacy picked me up to take me to the airport. Absolute madness. I checked in and then we went to Chili's for a beer. Stacy also bought me a couple of Lemon Drops, which are always pleasant.

I called a couple of peope (Myra, Kevin, Lauren, John - while we were at the Highlander) and then it was time to wander down to the gate. Stacy is going to pick me up at 10pm next Saturday and take me directly to the Apop/VNV show. Good grief, I'm going to Poland.

It's now 4:40pm and I'm on the plane to Newark, New Jersey. In two hours I will be boarding a LOT Poland Airlines plane (a 757 I think - did you know that LOT is the first Eastern European airline to use solely Western-built planes) to Warsaw (or Warszawa). Good gried, I'm going to Poland.

A little time has passed. I landed at Newark; it is a busy airport. Even Air New Zealand stops here. Woo. So I checked in to my Lot Poland flight, seat 2B - right up the front. Exciting - the first to hit water (He says hoping that doesn't happen). They gave me a pass to the Virgin Atlantic lounge, so I'm sipping on a Jack Daniels and Coke next to a table of official-looking Poles, and recharging the batteries in my laptop.

Observation: Every Polish chick I have encountered (granted there has only been five, and that has been one yesterday and four at the Lot check-in booth today) has been very cute. Their bright blue eyes are truly captivating, and their faces are beautifully constructed. This trip to Poland could be a dangerous things....

Oh, before I forget, Stacy and I stopped in at the Body Shop on the way to the bar (at the airport, that is) and we bought me some smelly stuff - a cologne and a body wash. I must admit that it smelled good and manly. Teehee.

Okay, so it's now 9:05pm (Eastern Summer Time) and I'm somewhere above the Atlantic Ocean. I may even still be over Canada. No idea at all. What I do know is that a cute chickie is singing a song that with a chorus that goes something like "I turn to you/When the sun goes down/I turn to you." It's a quite pleasantly inane pop tune. If anybody out there knows it, please tell me so I can by the album. I don't think it's Britney, nor that Christina chick, but she seems to be of that mold.

Now, as I was saying, I'm on the plane, and we're flying at thirty-something thousand feet. They did have the details on a while ago, but that was before they put on the pop videos. Oh did I mention the pop videos that go with the pop songs. Right now , "Don't you like it like this?" is another chickie (although not as cute as the previous) song. Oh, that's finished and Miss Spears in on. She's kinda cute in a rock star sort of way. Now where was I. I was trying to tell a story before I was rudely interrupted by these chick pop stars.

I realise now that there probably wasn't a point. I was listening to VNV Nation at the airport, and then I was listening to Apoptygma Berzerk, and now I'm listening to teen pop sensations. Rock on. But I wish to digress, if I may, to talk about the menu. Did I mention I was in Business Class. I didn't? Well maybe I should. I'm in Business Class. If you are going to travel internationally, that is the only way to travel. Screw that Economy Class bullshit. I did it once. In fact I did it several times. (oh, new song - Loise, "2 Face"). Anyway, Business Class gives you a big seat, nice headphones, and free alcohol. Alcohol is good. Did I ever mention what the Hitchikers Guide To The Galaxy says about alcohol? I'll tell you in a minute, because the flight attendent has just indicated that food is on the way...

Wow, now that was good food. What did I have? Okay, for starters was a very nice salad, with vegetables that either I don't know the name of, or that were prepared in a way that I am unaccustomed to. Either way it was damn good. With that was the appetiser of crab claws with a cranberry sauce. Definitely not sticking my nose up at that - excellent fare. For my main I had a filet of sole, with boiled potatoes, beans and carrots. Well, I don't like cooked carrots, so I skipped those, and the beans really were over-boiled, but that fish, ohmigod, to die for. It was so good. And the potatoes, they were incredible, too. Definitely all about the fish and potatoes. With the meal I had a Laforêt Bourgogne Chardonnay A.O.C. (Maison Joseph Drouhin) which was pretty good.

When the main was finished it was time cheese and crackers (with more chardonnay, of course). The cheese was a hard cheese (not sure which), a blue cheese, and a soft cheese (Brie, I believe). Following this was a rich-as-fuck chocolate cake with a snifter of cognac (Courvoisier), which went down a treat. Question for the wise out there - who really, and I mean really, drinks cognac for fun? I mean it's nice and all, but really there are much tastier alcohols out there. Speaking of which, I wasn't overly impressed with the Zytnia vodka I had before dinner. It was okay, but it was no Belvedere. Then again, that's no surprise considering my current locale. For the record, on the rocks.

So dinner is now over, and I must say that it was very good. I definitely enjoyed it. The flight steward who served me reminded me of a younger, more polite, and very definitely Polish, Basil Fawlty. I guess it was the moustache and short hair which did it. And the tallness.

Point of note: It is now 22:29 (10:29pm to those of you who can't count beyond 12), and we're roughly five and a quarter hours from Warsaw. I should probably try to get some sleep about now. So far we have flown over New York, Boston, Halifax and Saint Johns. Speaking of Saint Johns, isn't Newfoundland a really blah name for a province? I'm sure it's beautiful and all, but really, what a silly name. Which is not to say that any other name is much better, but you know how it goes. Hmm, maybe the cognac is getting to me after all....

Now I was going to talk to you about alcohol, and in particular what the Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy has to say about it. It actually has a lot to say about it, but there is something in particular about alcohol, and in particular drunkeness that I think everyone should recognise. What it says is this:

"Go to it. And good luck."

Of course, when it comes to alcohol, the guide has a lot of other interesting things to say, but I like that. There is also a very good part of Life, The Universe, and Everything that talks about alcohol. It goes something like this:

Then he [Zaphod] had thought about what his position actually was and the renewed shock had nearly made him spill his drink. He drained it quickly before anything serious happened to it. He then had another quick one to follow the first one down and check that it was all right.

...

"I can't cope with it [freedom]," he said darkly, and sent a third drink down to see why the second drink hadn't yet reported on the condition of the first. He looked uncertainly at both of her [Trillian], and preferred the one on the right.

He poured a drink down his other throat with the plan that it would head the previous one off at the pass, join forces with it, and together they would get the second to pull itself together. Then all three would go off in search of the first, give it a good talking to.

He felt uncertain as to whether the fourth drink had understood all that so he sent down a fifth to explain the plan more fully and a sixth for moral support.

Ah, alcohol, one of the greatest inventions of mankind. Sure it has screwed up people all over the world, but hey, if it wasn't alcohol, it would have been something else.

Okay, now I really am somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean. All that is below is water. Not that I can see it, because it is dark. Tonight is a party at Jill and Stephen's. I would have gone, but I'm in a plane. Stacy might be going with Lauren. Hmm, Stacy said something about going out with Sarah sometime. That should be interesting, seeing how many chicks try to pick up Stacy. I mean, she is very female.

Time for a nap, I think. I'll update things when I get to the hotel. Or around breakfast time. Hmm, they just brought rounf the duty free cart. I don't think I'll get anything at this point. Maybe when I go home...

I got a little bit of sleep, but it wasn't great. Oh well. Breakfast came, but I only ate the fruit and had couple of glasses of orange juice.

3 September

My computer says that it's 5:44am. The clock in my hotel room says 11:45. So Poland is six hours ahead of Atlanta. Interesting.

The plane landed at Warsaw at around 10am. I made my way out to customs, picking up some cash on the way. Keeping track of everything could be tricky, especially as I don't really know how much money I'm going to need and I don't know how much anything costs. I could do with a Coke right now.

I made my way through customs with no problems, collected my bag and caught a taxi to my hotel, the Orbis Forum Warszawa. Once in I had a much-needed shower and tried to sort myself out. I'm pretty tired, so I may take a nap. But I must let myself get adjusted to this time zone.

I have been lying on my bed for a few hours trying to nap without actually going to sleep. This has proved difficult. The alarm clock (looks like valve technology) doesn't appear to actually have a working alarm, although the radio does work. On the TV I have watched CNN, BBC, Sportsworld and a mixture of German and French channels. I also tried to get hold of Andy who is arriving in from the UK today. As at 5pm he had checked in, but was not answering his phone. I will have to try again later. Another problem that has arisen is that there are no RJ-11 jacks for me to plug my modem into. I think there is a business center nearby where I may be able to do this.

Oh wow! It's Xena, dubbed into German. No it's not Xena, it's something else that is showing clips from all sorts of things, based around some sort of archaeolgical dig. Bizarre.

I had picked up a set of worldwide adaptors so I could plug my (few) electronic devices ino Polish mains outlets. I can't see any sockets for telephone equipment; the phone has cable going from it into the wall. Never mind. Oh yeah, the phone is a rotary dial. Rock on! Hmm, Why hasn't Andy tried to call me? The bathroom looks nice and clean and modern, in slight contrast to the rest of the room, which looks like it hasn't changed much since the 1970s.

Aha! I must have fallen asleep, as I can distinctly recall dreams. Details are kinda sketchy though, but seemed to have me staying in a different location to my home. In one I went to Kerikeri. In another (maybe the same) a classmate from University (Craig) and I were looking for the Wednesday night Trivia game. Weird.

I gave Andy another call and this time he was in. So he popped over to my room and we talked for a bit before going to get some food. We wandered down the road a little and crossed over to "The London Steakhouse." Heheh. We had a glass each of the local brew, and I had a strange sounding meal that I think was Polish. It was pork in sauce (I forget the name), and had a stuffing on the side made of chicken, pork, peach, cherry, and some green stuff. It was good, if a little odd in flavour.

After that we wandered back to the hotel. Andy is going to give me a call at 7am so we can get breakfast, find the business center so we can download email, and then it's off to Coca Cola Poland.

4 September

My sleep wasn't the most consistent I've ever had, but it wasn't too bad. The last period between wakeups was abour two and a half hours. I got up and had a shower around 7am, (um, that's 1am in Atlanta) and wasn't feeling too bad. Then it was off downstairs for breakfast (bread, cheese, sausage, orange juice).

The next trick was to try to deliver and collect email. That wasn't so successful. The business centre place had RJ11 jacks for me to plug my modem into, but I just couldn't get a clean line. After half an hour of trying, I gave up. Yes, I'm a quitter. Next it was a fun taxi ride to Annapol and Coca-Cola Poland!

Today kept me pretty busy, trying to understand the business here (and trying to understand Polish...). Fortunately, our main contact here speaks very fluent English. Unfortunately, he's not the one I have to give training to. As a result, a translator has been hired for tomorrow. That should prove to be an interesting exercise.

I did pick up a little Polish: Tak = Yes, Nie = No, Prosze (prosh'eh) = Please, Dzikuie (jekwe'a) = Thanks. I can recognise some words in the sentences I am hearing, although they are mainly newer words or words of latin origin.

After another exciting taxi ride, I was back at the hotel. When we got back there was a large group of American tourists checking in. Ugh! We reserved a room for Dave (the project manager, who is coming through on Wednesday) and then popped back to our rooms to get changed. In a few minutes, Andy and I will be hunting down food. With a bit of luck, someone will have killed it already...

By the way, the Coke office out here is very modern and well equipped. And it is flying Polish, US and Australian flags. I know why the Aussie flag is being flown. Do you? (I'll give you the answer in a couple of days - but the first person to email me with the correct answer will win a prize. Employees of Coke and Marconi are exempt from this competition - ie, anyone who might actaully know the answer).

New stuff to tell. Number one: Tonight there were American movies on the television. On the Polish channels. Were they dubbed into Polish? No. Did they have Polish subtitles? No. Did they have someone talking over the top translating? Hell yeah! So you got the English and the Polish. The Polish in a direct translation without emotion, by a single person translating for all sexes, in a matter-of-fact voice. Weird.

Number two: There is a bar on the street beside the hotel. It is called Patrick's Irish Pub. Outside are tables with white and green umbrellas, advertising...Grolsh. Hmmm, Holland, Ireland, well, the last four letters are the same...

Number three: We had dinner. At a place called Paris Texas. It had French cuisine and American cuisine. I went for the French. Cod cooked in Catalan style, in fact. Hrm, isn't Catalan Spanish, though? Well, in any case it was good. I had Creme of Mushroom soup to start with as well. And we had a couple of glasses (0,5l) of Polish beer, which was also tasty. The waitress was kind of cute, in an Eastern European sort of way. They didn't take American Express, so Andy paid cash, and, well, ended up tipping much more than he intended. Oh well, put it all down to experience...

Okay, I'm tired of listening to Polish translations of American dialogue, so time to change the channel.

5 September

Bread, cheese, ham, sausage, watermelon, orange juice, grapefruit juice. I can deal with these sorts of breakfasts.

Then it was another exciting taxi ride to the Coke plant. Today's big trick: training four Poles how to use our vending machine management system when none of them speak English, and I don't speak Polish. Fortunately there was a translator, and the guys seemed very interested, and overall I think the day went pretty well.

And then things got kind of difficult. I tried to send a bunch of emails back to various people in Marconi based on the training and later meetings of today, but the link between the US office and the NZ office was down, which meant I couldn't log on to the email system. Shit. Damn. Bugger. I eventually gave up on trying, after ensuring the US office was working on the problem, and Andy and I headed back to the hotel. The taxi drivers here in Warsaw may not be as exciting as those in Mexico City, but they are definitely more adventurous than their American counterparts.

I neglected to mention before that the cafetaria at the Coke plant was damn good. A good selection of hot foods were on the menu, that filled up a good sized plate for roughly US$1. Not bad at all. Yesterday I had meatballs and some sort of rice-like grain that was very tasy. Today I had chicken filet on rice with a cheese-tomato sauce. It was particularly good as it wasn't until 3ish thatwe got to lunch.

Eek! Domino's is in Warsaw. I expected the McDonalds (and there is a really big one) and the Burger King; I wasn't too surprised by the KFC and Pizza Hut; but Domino's Pizza? No, that's wrong. Speaking of Americana in Eastern Europe, on the side of my hotel is an enormous Pepsi sign.

Another update type thing. I think that song I heard on the plane, I Turn To You might actually be by Christina Aguilera (or however it's spelled). On RTL is Fresh Prince of Bel Air, or should I say, Prinz von Bel Air. Dubbed in German, of course. It's interesting, the voices used, considering one know the normal voices. Hmm, maybe time to change to channel. Oooh! Skateboard World Cup in Prague on the EuroSport channel. Rock on! Tobias Albert winning the Street style. Now it's the Half-Pipe. That's pretty impressive, too.

If I don't hear any news about the network link in the next twenty minutes, I will be stuck unable to deliver the necessary mail. This is disturbing and annoying. Not as disturbing as the fuel crisis in France. Shit, a 40% increase in oil prices and an 80% tax imposed by the government. No wonder the Frogs are pissed. But these truckers who are blockading delivery of fuel really are wankers. Sure prices are high, but you don't cripple a country like this just because you are pissed at prices. Then again, you don't charge such huge taxes either.

The phone call from the US came at 8:05, buy by that stage the Business Center had closed, so I won't be able to do mail until the morning. So we went walking in search of food. After about half an hour of wandering we stopped at a place and had dinner. Once again, we had a glass (0,5l) of the local brew. Andy had vegetable lasagne, I had bouef strogonow. It was damn good.

After dinner we came back to the hotel and had a couple of drinks in the hotel bar. It was funny, seeing the local "working girls" picking up tricks. Heheh, quite entertaining. After a couple of local brews I had a chilled vodka (yum yum yum), and it was back to my room to ring NZ to discuss the emails I couldn't send today.

6 September

Once again, the usual start: 7am wakeup, shower, breakfast (bread, cheese, ham, sausage, juice, fruit), exciting taxi ride, download email at the Coke plant.

And then it was on to Polish Training Session, Part Deux. This training is actually going pretty well, I think. It is definitely a worthwhile experience. All four guys remind me of someone from back home. Not necessarily any one of my friends, but people I have encountered. Heheh. Interesting...

After the training session was over, it was off to lunch in the cafetaria. A crumbed meat product, mashed potatoes in an interesting sauce, steamed vegetables, and a coke for PLN7,50. That's 7 zlot7 and 50 groszy. Roughly US$1.67 or NZ$4.00. Now that's good value.

Observation of the day: Poles have a liking for waistcoats.

Word for the day: scrounge - verb, to indulge in a carnal act of lust; have sex. Apparently two of my acquaintances engaged in the act of scrounging while I was away and at least one of that party wants to keep it a secret. Of course, I have my sources who are oviously not so good at keeping secrets. Then again, there is an ulterior motive for this person giving me this information, as this person knows that I was interested in scrounging one of the aforementioned (however non-specifically) scroungers.

I'm tired. I'm mostly done for the day, but I'm waiting on one of the local managers so I can have a meeting with him. The other IS guy I need to talk with has gone for the day and won't be back until tomorrow morning. Sheesh. Oh well. I could actually do with a sleep right now. It's 4:20pm here in Warsaw, 3:20pm in Britain, 10:20am in Atlanta, and 2:20am in New Zealand. My body really doesn't quite know where it is. I'm drinking a lot of Coke, though to keep me awake. It's easy when it's free.

I'm also losing track of days. I've only been here a few days but I still can't work out what day it is half the time. Granted, this is possibly in part to the fact I'm doing long days and my body isn't quite sure what the time is (maybe I should start wearing a watch again). Did you know that I haven't worn a watch in over 18 months? I took it off one day and never bothered to put it back on. The alarm goes off every evening at 8:30pm (there's a good reason for that, just don't ask me what it is), but of course I can't hear it since I am in Poland and it is in the US. Ooooh, philosophical question: if an alarm goes off and there's no-one around to hear, does it really make a noise? Good grief, I must be tired.

Just got back to the hotel. It turns out that a Jakarta-back militia bombed the UN outpost in West Timor, in protest over East Timor's independence from Indonesia. Now that is pretty fucked up.

I had some other thoughts in the taxi that I wanted to talk about. Unfortunately, I can't remember what they are now. Maybe I'll remember later. Damn.

Okay, before we go any further, it turns out that my boss (who is based in the UK) wants me to stay in Poland for at least another week. This does not suit me at all. I have plans for Saturday night, and I have already started arranging a number of meetings with our US-based customers for next week. Not only that, my visa expires on Saturday, my AMEX bill is due and I don't have sufficient funds in my bank account (due to the fact I paid for another person's hotel accomodation - at the company's request).

So that aside, Dave (who is Project Manager) arrived today and he, Andy, and myself went out to dinner tonight at a nice restaurant. I had mushroom soup and chicken stuffed with mushrooms and spinach. It came with vegetables and roast potatoes, and really was damn good. After dinner we went to the Irish pub by the hotel for a couple of beers (EB, a local Polish beer). The pub had a local band playing (not very Irish at all). Dave surprised me a bit in his interest in a lot of music that I like, not the least being the Manic Street Preachers, one of his (and my) favourite bands.

I'm going to bed. I will try and deal with these work issues (staying in Poland, and the excessive AMEX bill) tomorrow.

7 September

General thoughts. There is a lot of 80's pop music on Polish radio. There are very much fewer fat people than there are in the US.

Very busy day again. Another four hour training session in Polish. These guys I'm training are very keen, which makes this a lot more enjoyable than it might have been. They ask lots of questions, which means we don't cover as much as we might have, but what we do cover we do in a lot of detail.

For dinner, we go to a steakhouse called "Alamo." I had the mushroom soup ("zupa" = soup) and a Louisiana steak with fries. The steak was good, covered with herbs. Very tasty.

8 September

More busy busy busy, but as this is to be my last day of training, this was understandable. I've had a bunch of observations over the last couple of days, but due to how busy I've been, I haven't had a chance to note them down, or remember them. Damn damn damn.

Dariusz, the equipment manager at Coca-Cola Polska, who we have been dealing with for this project gave Andy and myself a bottle each of special Polish vodka. It's green, apparently, and very strong. I shall wait until I get back to the US to try it. Dariusz also imparted on me the knowledge of how vodka should be consumed: chilled (of course) in a shot glass; take a deep breath, hold it, throw back the shot, breathe out. Rock on, Dariusz!

So, I'm now all set (I think) for my flight back tomorrow. My plane leaves at 1:30, so I have to aim to be at the airport around 11:30. It looks like my rate is 255DM per night, which is about US$120. This is pretty expensive considering the quality of the rooms. Oh well, it appears that hotels are generally expensive in Poland.

I guess that's about all I've got to say for now. I'll probably add stuff when I'm airborne over Europe tomorrow afternoon.

Well, Andy and I decided to try the buffet of Polish food at one of the restaurants in the hotel. Unfortunately the food was particularly outstanding. I just can't get into raw fish in jelly. It's just doesn't taste very good. I don't have a problem with raw fish (I do eat sushi), but this was not good. The vegetables were all boiled to tastelessness. The duck was okay, but the apples threw me (I don't like cooked apples). The chicken wasn't too bad, breadcrumbed as it was, and the mushroom sauce was pretty good. There were also crepes with cottage cheese as an appetiser.

After dinner we just went to the hotel cocktail bar and racked up a 356 zloti (~US$80) tab. I introduced Andy to the joy that is Jagermeister, and we also had some vodka between the beers. Speaking of which, the beer we had at the hotel was Lech. We had four different Polish brews over the course of the week. I can't remember all, but there was also E.B. and one beginning with z. They weren't too bad, although not my usual pick (these were more in the style of pilsners and lagers, whereas I prefer ales).

The bar was full of girls for the lonely traveller, and some of them weren't too bad looking. But I wasn't likely to go down that route, so to speak...

9 September

I went drinking with Andy last night. I can feel it. I wonder if he feels as bad as me. Then again, he will be asleep for a few more hours. Bastard. Hehe.

So I shower, finish packing (I hope), go have breakfast, and then check out. Total cost of the hotel? Somewhere in the vicinity of US$1000. Oh well, looks like my Amex bill is going to suck this month. Sure I claim it all back from Marconi, but I have to pay Amex first. Speaking of which, I got my last Amex bill just as I was leaving, and found an excessive charge that needs to be followed up on. Needless to say, a few choice words were uttered in the direction of a certain employee of Marconi.

And then I was airport bound. The cab was 60 zloti and I took a few photos as we drove along. Overall I didn't get a chance to take many photos at all, which was rather disappointing. Maybe next time.

Warsaw airport was pretty simple to navigate through. I got in one line to get my luggage x-rayed. Then I checked in. And then I looked for my flight details. Being a good international traveller, I was at the airport two hours in advance of the scheduled flight. Not that it did me any good; the flight was delayed. My ticket had boarding at 1:20pm to leave at 1:40. At 2:40 I was still sitting, waiting. There's not much to do in Warsaw's airport except find a seat at the bar or go duty-free shopping. So I did the latter and then just found a seat. The US has a limit of one bottle of duty-free alcohol, so I picked a pretty looking vodka.

Eventually the gate was opened, and sandwiches and drinks were available to those who wanted them. I had a coke and a sandwich, and just as I finished those, they started boarding.

Well, that's not really 100% accurate. They opened the doors from the gate, checked tickets and passports, and then allowed us to get on a bus to take us to the plane. Christ. The plane finally got loaded and took off. Unfortunately, the expected arrival time at Newark is 7:08. I think my flight to Atlanta leaves at 7:25. Looks like I'm not going to make it to the Apop show tonight. Fuck, damn and shit. I'm not happy. I will have to get hold of Stacy when I get out of customs. Damn. What's going to happen with my luggage? It has been checked through to Atlanta, although I do have to pick it up though customs. Not a good note to finish my Polish trip on.

Oh yeah, didn't like lunch too much either. Full of stuff I don't like, like raisins (or some other dried fruit), and apricot, and oily fish. Oh well, such is life. It wasn't meant to be easy :-).

The in-flight movie is The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas. I might watch it. I should be writing up a trip report and finishing my other report, but, eh, my day has already been screwed up so fuck'em.

Well that was pretty blah. Mildly entertaining at best. The chick who played Betty was kinda cute - I think it was the receptionist chick on Ally McBeal. All kind of silly really. Eh, never mind. I guess I'd better do something like work now, since there's a lot of it to do. I finished the Hitchikers Trilogy. All very entertaining. I've got a bunch of magazines in my bag I could read. Hmm, oh well, we'll see.

Just for the record, we passed over Rejkavik during the movie. I have a centre-row seat, so I wouldn't have seen it anyway. We're currently passing over Greenland. We haven't made up any time, so I'm not sure what is going to happen when I get to Newark. I would love to get back to see at least Apoptygma. Speaking of which, I am currently listening to 7 now. My earlier listenings today were Battery and VNV Nation. Ooh ooh ooh! I now know who sings that I Turn To You song that I mentioned on my way over to Poland. It appears this flight shares music videos with the other flight. It turns out that the chickie in question is one Melanie C. Interesting, eh?

Time to fill in customs declarations and entry visa cards. This is flight LO011.

Hey, useless piece of info here, but there's a song on this Apop CD that has melody for The Man Who Sold The World as a background melody. That's cool.

So I've started my report and I look up and there's a map on the screen. We're over the Labrador Sea closing in on Canada. The expected arrive time has improved. By a whole minute. Woo-bloody-hoo.

I've a bit of work on my Poland report. I've changed mini-discs (Therapy?). The flight attendents have brought round moist towels, so I guess they're going to feed us again. Then they came back with the drinks trolley. I'm keeping it sober this time, since I'm going to have to work out how I'm getting from Newark to Atlanta. Damn and blast. Two and a quarter hours to go.

This is the last entry until I get to Atlanta. Unless things really suck and I have to wait in Newark. I so want to get back to Atlanta tonight.

9 September

The plane landed at Newark International Airport in New Jersey at 7:15. Although I was second off the plane, there was no way that I was going to be on the 7:30 flight to Atlanta. However, the sooner one gets through the formalities, the sooner one can find a new flight. Or at least that's the theory.

It just so happened that moments before my flight landed, a plane from the UK also got in. And so when I got to immigration there was a large queue of people waiting to be processed. Oh well. I eventually got processed and made my way down to customs to collect my baggage and get it reassigned to a new plane.

So I waited. And I waited. I waited so long that they switched off the conveyor belt. Then they switched it on again. And eventually my bag popped out, Priority label and all. Ahem. So I raced over through customs with no hassle and off to find the Lot Polish Airlines desk so I could get a new flight home.

And there was nobody there. So I waited (I seemed to be doing a lot of waiting) and also tried (in vain) to find my cell phone. I asked a nearby airport employee what the story was and he went to page the Lot people. Eventually some people turned up. This was now 8:20pm. There was a couple in front of me, so I let them get dealt with first. They were going to Baltimore, but the Lot people told them that no more flights were available, and they would have to get a flight in the morning, Needless to say, they were not impressed. But wait.

It's now just on 8:30. The guy looks at my next leg ticket and screws his face up in confusion. "We booked you onto the 8:30 flight. It looks like you've just missed it though." Thanks a fucking lot - why the fuck weren't you here 20 minutes ago - then I probably would have made the flight. They're not interested in finding me another flight tonight, so I also have to stay in Newark, Fun Central of the World. Well, at least they paid for the hotel.

When I finally get to the hotel I call Stacy to apologise for not being at Hartsfield when I said I would be. There were no phones in the transfer area (how fucking stupid is that!). So we arrange for her to pick me up in the morning, even though she is still feeling sick.

From what I heard, the Apop/VNV show was really rather good. All I can say is, you all suck. Thank you. Looking on the bright side (as one must), my freezer is looking pretty good at the moment.

10 September

Okay, so last night sucked and I didn't get back to see the show. So now I'm trying to get to Washington, DC to see them there tonight. I'll tell you about the angst in Newark later. But right now I'm trying to get to DC, so leave me alone.

Up early (not that I slept well) and back to the airport to make that flight to Atlanta. Triffic. Stacy picked me up, and since she wasn't feeling too good she dropped me home. I started did some washing and tried to sort myself out. Eventually I got peckish and went up to the pub for a drink and some food. Andrea was working the bar, so I got to tell her my long and traumatic story.

Stacy came up for a bit, but due to her unwellness she headed home. Lauren also came up a little later and we had a good chat about her experiences at the show (she got to interview Ronan). I mentioned that I might look up where else they were going to be playing and try to see them in another city.

Lauren: They're playing in D.C. tonight.

Damon: Yeah?

Lauren: You know, we could probably get a flight there in time to see the show...

Damon: Hmmmmmm......

Lauren: What do you think?

Pause...

Damon: What the fuck, let's do it!

Ten minutes later I'm sitting in front of my computer looking up flights to DC. Delta is going to cost $750 each for a round trip. I call Lauren, and we decide that's a little too expensive. Lauren tries AirTran and we get tickets for $525 each return. But the flight leaves in one hour.

So I grab my wallet, some cologne, jump in the car and race over to Lauren's. She has managed to throw some stuff into a bag (I have nothing more than what I am wearing and the few things in my pockets). And we race off to the airport.

5:20 rolls around and we are sitting, right at the back, on a flight to Washington, DC. Less than an hour and a half previously we were discussing the options for my seeing VNV and Apop, and now I'm on my way to DC to do it. That's got to be a 10 out of 10 for coolness.

A couple of hours later and we land at Dulles and race down to get some cash and then grab a taxi. Little did we know, however, that Dulles is some 30 miles from Washington DC, and the resultant taxi fare ($50) was rather shocking. Nevertheless, we were at the Black Cat, surrounded by goth and industrial kids, all pumped for a great show.

Except that it never happened. The show had been cancelled no more than an hour previously. (It was also sold out.) So there were a lot of pissed off people around. Lauren and I found it perversely amusing, considering what we just did to get to the show, and went in search of food.

Which we found. It was a small Italian pizzeria, similar in style to Pizze Fritti where we had dined a couple of weeks previously. And it was very good. We had a bottle of wine, salad, and fantastic pizza; mine was loaded with mushrooms, Lauren's had cool-named potatoes on it. It was all very very very good. So coming to DC wasn't a complete loss; it's not often you can say that you flew to another city for dinner...

After dinner we wandered back to the club, which put on a regular club night. The support band played (they were doing scary industrial covers) and then we moved to the next door club and had more to drink while watching people. Tiredness was overtaking me with some rapidity (it had been a long day) so we headed back to the airport.

11 September

Another $50 later and we were looking for somewhere to sleep in the airport. We found some niceish seats and caught some shut eye. About 5:30 we went in search of planes and discovered that there was a flight prior to the one we were booked on. So we changed flights, upgraded to business class and went in search of the gate.

And then we were back in Atlanta. We lost the car briefly at the airport and then joined the rush hour traffic back into Midtown. I dropped Lauren home and then went to my own apartment for a couple of hours sleep and then I went in to work for a couple of hours.

The madness doesn't stop there. Oh no.

After work, Stacy wanted me to go up to the pub. I was feeling pretty shagged, so I said I'd go up for a couple of beers and a light dinner, but then it would be an early night.

I had my light dinner (a small caesar salad) and my two beers and was then looking to go home, when Stacy decided it was time to buy shots. It would not be mistaken to say that it was all over from that point on. John, Sarah and Barry turned up at some point - they had been drinking because one of the guys that they hate at their work just quit. I bailed about 1:30ish, and from what I understand the rest of them closed the bar out. A big night.

12 September

Work wasn't too bad today, although my tiredness was still very much in evidence. Thompson had rung the previous day and we had organised to go to the Local for a drink or two. I wasn't feeling like spending much time there, but we went up anyway. Lauren and Clair also came out. And Will. And Andie. And Jesse, who gave me a Happy Kidney. And people learned how to play Suicide Mexicans. We saw Jenny and Stacy before they went to the Braves game. And we also saw them after the Braves game. So the night turned into a bigger one than expected. Heheh. So it goes.

13 September

More stuff was successfully completed at work. This is good. It means the pile shrinks slightly. Or at least doesn't grow quite so quickly...

After work was Trivia, in which a good team competed (Lauren, Clair, Stacy, Myra, Kevin, Lisa, Sarah, John). Jenny didn't turn up, due to yoga and tiredness. Lauren and I took off around 11pm. We had learned previously that if we are going to an opera on Thursday that an early night is required on the Wednesday. From what I understand, the others closed out the pub again. See, I'm not so bad. Really.

14 September

Work. Then Opera (Lucia di Lamermoor) at the Fox. This was rather good. Once again the leading woman performer was absolutely brilliant. And once again the leading males I found disappointing (although one did have a throat infection that didn't deter him - given this fact he was actually very good). The supporting male was better than the leads (this also is similar to the previous operas this year). But it was a good show.

After the opera, Lauren and I went (complete in our fineries) to Waffle House for supper. Hehe. Much fun. We played a very cool game of Let's Pretend.

15 September

Friday. More work and then play. The Local and then the Vault. There were some great people out: Andie, Grace, Shawn. We were pretty late in leaving the Local, but we had a splendid time at the Vault anyway. Lots of talking. Quite a bit of drinking. And a sufficient amount of dancing. A terrific night really. And some interesting stories and knowledge was passed around. But my lips are sealed.

16 September

Okay, all of this decadence and debauchery is starting to catch up with me.

But speaking of debauchery, there was more to come. For tonight we were celebrating Kevin's birthday. John, Stacy, Jenny, and I met up at the Local and sipped a whisky or three. Vanessa and her fiend Dill was also there and we invited them to come join the festivities. Vanessa was wearing a black wig, and I didn't recognise her at first. I was just about to ask John to introduce his friend when I recognised her. Hehe.

From the Local we took off up to The Pink Pony. It should take too many guesses to determine what sort of club the Pony is. Kevin and Lisa were already there and having a good time. It was John's first time at a strip bar, so I bought him a lap dance. And then we proceeded to drink ourselves silly, indulging in the occasional lap dance. Later a bunch from the Local turned up (Matt leading the pack). Matt bought me a lap dance from one extremely hot dancer. Hehe, loads of fun was had by all.

And it was about then that I noticed that two of our party were sucking face - Miss Martin and Vanessa's school friend. Rock on. Ha ha. More stories: We eventually had to leave. No, it wasn't closing time. Rather, John had been thrown out for going into the women's toilets (AKA the changing room). There is a story to this, but it's not as exciting as leaving you all wondering...

I think I will leave the stories of the rest of the night's decadence there.

17 September

Recovery Sunday

18 September

Can't really recall what went on today. (Especially considering I'm writing this two weeks after the fact...)

I guess I went to the Local for karaoke. Or maybe I didn't. I can't bloody remember.

19 September

Can't really recall what went on today, either. I must have been busy. I probably went to the Local after work.

20 September

My sister's birthday. Of course, it is now the 21st in NZ, so it's the day after her birthday, but so what.

Anyway, today is also Wednesday, which means that after work I went to the pub to play Trivia. Our most exciting team name: Power Puff Drunks: Drinking The World Before Bedtime! Heheh. I found it amusing. Of course, I had received a load of Power Puff Girls merchandise today. Like what? I'm not telling.

But we played a pretty rough game. There was me, Myra, John, Lauren, Kevin, Jenny. I can't remember if Stacy was there. Oh well.

After the game, Kevin, Myra, John, Lauren and I went over to Nomenclature for an hour or so, and then Kevn dropped Myra and I back at MJQ. We both drank and danced a whole heap. It was a very fun night.

Myra stayed over because I felt that she had had too much to drink to be driving back to her place.

21 September

Road Trip To Orlando!!!

Feeling a little worse for wear after last night's extravaganza, I called up Jesse and off we headed to Orlando for five days of fun park excitement.

We made pretty good time, with little to distract us on our trip, and we pulled into the Hampton Inn on Kirkman, just off International Drive, not far from Universal Studios. We got a room easily enough and went in search of eating.

Now, as we were driving along, I noticed that the brakes were making a god-awful noise, and becoming more concerned about it, we pulled into Olson Tire Total Car Care. We wandered inside and said "Hey, my brakes are making horrible noises. Could you get someone to look at them for us?"

To which the gentleman behind the counter said, "Sure thing. You know, we don't see too many Decoded Feedback t-shirts around here." And from then we proceded to discuss the local goth/industrial scene and recent events. Very cool. So we felt comfortable leaving the car with Scott, who said he'd give us a call by 11am tomorrow. From there we walked up to Universal Studios, for dinner at Jimmy Buffett's Margaritaville.

We had dinner. And we had margaritas. Lots of them. We started with a Texas Margarita and then moved on to the ones on the menu: Parrothead's Perfect Margarita, Who's To Blame, Uptown Top Shelf, Mexican Cutie, Last Mango In Paris, Jimmy's Margarita. For what it's worth, stay away from the Mexican Cutie. The Last Mango In Paris was damn good. Very tasty. For foodage I had jambalaya. And then we headed back to the hotel (via taxi) to get some sleep in preparation for the excitement ahead.

22 September

I got paged in the early hours. Why don't people listen to voice mail messages that say "I am out of town for several days, call this number instead"? Sheesh!

Universal Studios Islands of Adventure

Please note that I need to revise a lot of this as I am writing it up in a hotel in Nashville a week or so after the event, and without my maps and things.

And now the fun really begins in earnest. Scott from the auto repairs place called to say the car would be ready mid-afternoon. The front brakes were shot to pieces, and the rear ones need looking at in the next couple of months. With that chore aside, we elected to go to Islands of Adventure until Scott called to say the car was done.

We caught a taxi down to Universal and purchased our two-day passes, and then proceeded over to Islands of Adventure, starting with Marvel Super Hero Island. Our first ride, The Incredible Hulk. This is a roller-coaster that goes up and down and loops around and pretty much gives you all the expected thrills of a roller coaster in about 20 seconds or so. It was fun. And it was green.

After the Hulk ride we slipped over into Storm Force Accelatron, otherwise known as the spinning round in circles ride. Nothing too crazy here, except that it done make one a little dizzy. After the ride I grabbed a hot dog and took a couple of photos.

We wandered along a bit, skipping Dr Doom and instead checking out The Amazing Adventures of Spiderman. This was a very cool ride, involving 3-D glasses (and hence visuals), tactile effects (heat and water), sudden drops and spins, and loud noises. And it had a good story line.

From here we moved into Toon Lagoon and embarked on a rather wet (but very fun) ride called Dudley Do-Right's Ripsaw Falls. This was a wet one. A very wet one. We skipped the other rides here, as they also involved a lot of water.

Then it was over to the Jurassic Park ride, which once again included water and a very long line. Bit it was entertaining as we were attached by velociraptors and a tyranosaurus rex just before dropping 40 feet. Fun fun fun!

This was followed by lunch at the Jurassic Park Discovery Center. Scott called us at this time to say the car was ready. We enquired as to the closing time of the shop and indicated we would pick up the car by then.

Next on our adventure was The Lost Continent and Duelling Dragons. This has to be experienced to be believed: two rollercoasters, intertwined, spininng around each other, charging into each other, just wild. Not only that, your feet hang free. We did the fire dragon first and then we waiting to be front seats for the ice dragon. Woah, man, breathtaking.

It was closing in on three o'clock as we passed The Eighth Voyage of Sindbad, which, curiously enough, was the time of the next showing. So we wandered in, took our seat and watched a cheesy (but entertaining) stage show that included stunts, explosions, and more than a little comedy.

Out journey continued to Poseidon's Fury: Escape from the Lost City. This was a walk-through adventure with extra effects, based (very loosely) on Greek legend. I say very loosely because it takes what it wants from legend and creates a new story that is nothing like legend. Oh well. It was interesting, nonetheless...

The final part of Islands of Adventure was Seuss Landing and one of the best rides ever: The Cat In The Hat.

Next stop, the pub. Three 32oz beers later and it was time to collect the car and move it a few blocks over to the Japanese Steakhouse for dinner. Awww yeah.

We started with sushi (of course) and a bottle of Ichiban. Then we had soup and were entertained by our chef during the cooking phase of the meal. Much sake was also consumed.

We got back to the hotel and Jesse was not in a good state. In the end he passed out and I was left wondering what to do at 10pm on a Friday night. So I decided to get a taxi into downtown Orlando and go to Barbarella.

And what a fantastically brilliant move that was. It was their indie-alternative music night, and I spent the next three-and-a-half hours (from about 11pm) dancing my proverbial arse off. I only had four beers in that time as I was too busy bouncing, spinning, and generally shaking my booty. I got back to the hotel about three and promptly passed out.

23 September

Universal Studios

Today was a little slower than yesterday. But it was still a pleasant day, as we wandered around Universal Studios Orlando.

We came in through the arch, past the Universal Globe (that doesn't included New Zealand, I noted), and into Production Central. There are more merchandising outlets here than you can safely shake a stick at. But then again, that's only to be expected. Our first stop was Alfred Hitchcock: The Art of Making Movies. This consisted of a movie and some demonstrations of how Hitchcock did some of his effects. An out-take of a 3-D version of The Birds was played and that was pretty cool.

We wandered on up to New York and Twister...Ride It Out. This talked a bit about the special effects in the film and then demonstrated the effects with everyone being a part of it. There is even a flying cow. It's the truth.

Up 57th St and along the way we found Kongfrontation, wherein our cablecar is attacked by the biggest monkey of them all. This was fun, but not as exciting as the Islands of Adventure rides. I think that it is safe to say that the rides here were somewhat more sedate.

Next we walked up The Embarcadero and into San Francisco/Amity where we had a role in Earthquate - The Big One. Kinda hokey, but fun. We skipped Jaws due to the insane wait time and continued round to World Expo and two of the more fun rides: Men in Black Alien Attack, in which we got to shoot aliens as we did the ride, and Back to the Future which was also pretty fun.

We skipped Woody Woodpecker's Kidzone and dived down Hollywood Boulevard and Terminator 2: 3-D Battle Across Time. This was a pretty cool 3-D movie with interacting actors. Very well done.

And then it was time to zip back to Islands of Adventure to The Cat in the Hat again before heading back to the hotel for a nap before dinner.

We napped late, and headed to Outback for a dinner of steak. Steak is good. Unfortunately, I was defeated by the steak. It was good, however.

I seem to recall we also spent a bit of time watching the women's gymnastics that was on (olympics, you see). NBC were doing played delayed coverage of everything, which was pissing off a lot of people, but they figured that it was the best way of doing things to get the ratings. So nobody in the USA could watch the Olympics live (unless they lived near Canada and could get Canadian TV). Sucky, eh?

24 September

Epcot Center

Sunday was the start of our Disney experience, and Epcot was the place of choice, as we expected Magic Kingdom to be overrun with children, and, frankly, I don't like children.

We parked quite close to the gate and got a ride in a little open bus thingy to the gate. There were a lot of a very strange species of bug called "Love Bugs." They were odd looking. At the gate we bought our tickets for today and for Magic Kingdom tomorrow.

The first thing that you notice (and recognised) about Epcot is the great big ball thing just inside the fron gate. It is large, and currently has Mickey's arm holding a wand (a la Fantasia) and the numerals 2000 beside it. Very fancy. And that was our first stop: Spaceship Earth (presented by AT&T). Oh yeah, everything here is sponsored by some large company. A little silly really, but of course, someone has to pay for these things to be built.

Anyway, Spaceship Earth is a ride that takes you through the history of communication. It makes a number of large jumps in it's dialogue and doesn't explain a number of important things (like telegraph, telephone, television), and towards the end is just a great big advertisement for AT&T. Well, you get that. After this ride we went and had food.

Hunger assuaged, out next stop was Universe of Energy (presented by Exxon). And Ellen Degeneres. Now this was a commercial for fossil fuel usage if ever there was one. I don't really have much to say about this, except buy hybrid and non-gasoline powered vehicles.

Following the Exxon propaganda, we explored Wonders of Life (presented by MetLife). We had a ride inside the body with Body Wars and then explored the operation of the brain of an adolescent boy in Cranium Command. We also did a couple of health type tests which told me nothing I didn't already know (stop drinking, do more exercise, eat better foods, yadda yadda yadda).

We wandered round past the Odyssey Center towards the Walk of Nations (or whatever it is called) that showcases a number of countries. The first country that we hit was Mexico, which was represented by a great big Aztec pyramidal temple and a cantina. Inside the temple were shops and a restaurant and some people were doing a festive dance thing. There was a boat ride that took us through the history of Mexico, or at least some part of the history of that land. Everything was dark as in a faux night.

When we came out of the darkness of Mexico into the light of Epcot, we discovered that it was raining. Hard. Very hard. We waited a bit for it to lighten up, and when it didn't we ran across to the cantina and I had a margarita. It just had to happen: it's raining and you're in a pretend Mexico, so what else are you going to do. After I finished the margarita, the rain was still coming down, and we were beginning to tire of it. So Jesse said, "let's go to the pub over in the United Kingdom."

So we did. We got rather soaked in the process, but we got the UK and ordered ourselves a couple of (very) expensive beers (Bass for Jesse and Guiness for myself). We had a couple of pints, met a couple of New Zealanders, and when the rain stopped we continued our travels.

We passed France and the Eiffel Tower. We had a look at the menu of the restaurant in Morocco. It looked good, but now was not eating time. Japan was next on our travels.

And here we looked at a gallery of Japanese armour and weapons and an exhibit of mechanical dolls, and we took in some shopping at the Mitsukoshi Department Store.

We rushed through The American Adventure and didn't stick around for long in Italy. In Germany we stopped to chat to the very cute chickie selling Beck's (real beer!) and Jagermeister. We had one of each, and when we tried to tip the girl she told us she wasn't allowed to accept tips. So Jesse through some money at her and said "we're not tipping, we're just leaving some money here for whoever picks it up."

We continued round, stopping at the African Outpost for a drink, and to watch the Tapestry of Nations parade that went by. When this finished it's singing and dancing we proceeded on through China to Norway, where we rode Maelstrom, a history of Norway, chatted up a very cute Norwegian girl who was supervising the ride (well, Jesse did most of the chatting), and found out where they hang out after work. We then decided to have dinner at the Restaurant Akershus, where the food was good, the beer was good, and the service was excellent. Our waiter confirmed the after-work hangout and offerred to set us up with some of the girls.

After dinner (which concluded with a Norwegian liqueur) we checked out the IllumiNations 2000: Reflections of Earth fireworks display which was pretty damn impressive. And then it was all over and we had to leave. But before we did leave I asked one of the Norwegian girls if I could take her photo. She allowed me to do so, and also allowed me to give her a little kiss. Heheh.

We headed home for a nap and to decide whether to go to the House of Blues to pick up Norwegian babes or to go to Das Machine, Orlando's industrial night. Jesse was keen for the industrial music, so we did that. It was an okay night, but one does wonder what might have happened if we had gone back to Disney. Ah well, it was a good day anyway.

25 September

The Magic Kingdom

And, no, it's not a small world after all. So please shut up about it.

26 September

Hey world. I just got back from Orlando today. For the record I'd just like to say that I still have a crush on my Liverpool-loving friend. She is just the cutest thing in the world. And intelligent, too, which is that added bonus. I guess it just just sucks that she doen't feel the same as me....

I went to the Local to catch up with the crew: Lauren, Clair, John, Stacy, Dill. A late night ensued...

27 September

A day off. So I went shopping and did some cleaning.

And then it was Trivia with the Power Puff Drunks. This time we were Drinking the Beer before Bedtime. Me, Myra, Jenny, John, Kevin. Stacy and Dill turned up a little late, and Clair brought a friend.

I gave Myra the Pokemon frog critter that I bought for her Orlando. Kevin and John also put pay to the notion that John is not gay. :-)

We missed two one-point questions in the first round, and got three out of four in the half-time question. This placed us in second. A very good position, if I do say so myself. In the second half we had to guess a few, but it turned out our guesses were close enough to the answer that we got the points.

So, we were in first place (rock the fuck on!) going into the final question. And what a poser it was...

What breed of dog is named after a coastal region of Serbia?

You are kidding me? I had the answer written down before the question reader had started the song. The answer: Dalmatian. How do I know the answer? Well, you see, my mother had a friend (well, I think she has several) who married a gentleman from Yugoslavia (when there was a big happy communist Yugoslavia). And they had a son and daughter, the latter of which I last remember from the age of thirteen (when I was fourteen) who was really quite cute...

But anyway that was how I knew the answer. It ain't what you know, it's who you know...teehee...

We drank on for a bit and then Myra, Kevin and I headed over to MJQ. One of Kevin's ex-girlfriends was over there (who I have met before but can't remember her name) and I danced with her for a bit. I guess I flirted with her for a while as well...Eventually she and her friend disappeared and Myra and I bounced around for a while before I took off. I needed to get some sleep before my first day of work after vacation.

28 September

Early night

I ended up watching Cowboy Bebop: Second Sessions and then hitting the sack.

29 September

Worked until 11pm then went to Lauren's. I had planned on going home after that, but after a quick stop at the Local to see Stacy and Dill, I decided to head up to the Vault with the others (Christian, Genevieve, Lauren, Brad, Andie, Lea).

30 September

Worked 10:15am until 10pm. Then went to the Local for dinner (barbeque sandwich). Heather and Charlie were up there having a drink so I chatted with them for a while. John turned up and we ended up having a bit of a chat with the girls sitting to the right of me. It turns out one of them lives in the same apartment complex as John. He also found one of her friends, um, stimulating...

Then we a pit stop over at Lauren's to see how she was doing (and to say "Hi" to Thurston), and then we headed up to Christian's housewarming.